7/2/11 - Two and a Half

Well, we had big plans today, but none of them panned out. It was actually beautiful outside today (you know, that day or two of great weather between the unseasonably cold and the ridiculously hot kind of weather), but we really didn't take advantage of it. The girls slept in a little, but were quite crabby most of the day. I have no idea why. Christian and I ended up cleaning the house most of the day. I picked up the basement and cleaned up down there....we scrubbed the play mats and the dog kennel, vacuumed the upstairs and picked up toys after toys. How we managed to accumulate so many toys over the last few years, I have no idea! Before we knew it, it was already getting pretty late. We spent a little time outside before bedtime, then Christian was off to hang out with my cousin for a little while, giving me some peace and quiet, all to myself! YAY!

Today, Olivia officially hits the two and a half mark! It's so crazy to me. I don't think you can truly understand how fast time goes, until you have children, and you watch them blossom right in front of you. I am constantly amazed by what Olivia can do, what she can understand, what she is already capable of. She loves to help (sometimes, to a fault). People are usually pretty shocked by her conversation skills...she talks so much. She has ALWAYS repeated everything people around her say, and I think that's why she's become such a great talker so early. We never have any trouble figuring out what she wants, what she wants to do, and she loves to sit down and have full blown conversations. I just love it. It's kind of funny, but we get a lot of comments on her great utensil skills as well. LOL.

She has been fully potty trained for a couple months now, with virtually no accidents. She took to it like a moth to a flame, thank goodness! She's been in her toddler bed for a few weeks now, and she loves it. She's still a little bit of a picky eater, but I stand by my "if you don't eat it, you go 'hungry'" philosophy, and it seems to work for us. She is still the same rebellious, care free, dare devil that she's always been...climbing up and on everything, jumping off of anything, talking to and playing with anybody. She just seems to LOVE life, and everything the world has to offer so much. I just love living through her.

She does not go back to the doctor until she turns 3, so I don't have much for stat updates. I know she's still hovering around the 30lb mark. She wears mostly 3T clothes because of her height. She usually has to wear adjustable shorts or a belt though because of her waist. She uses regular cups (unless we're on the go), and pretty much insists on it. Her love for everything Mickey Mouse seems to be coming to an end, an she's moving quickly onto the world of princesses. So, looks like we'll have to start collecting some princess stuff now! She may be rough and tough, but she's a girly girl at heart, that's for sure!

So, here is a picture of my 2.5 year old....it's truly hard to believe! Love you bunches baby girl!

7/1/11 - LAID OFF

Ugh, it breaks my hard to even mutter those words. I am laid off. Wow, it still seems to unreal to me. I never thought this would happen!

Today is my regular day home with the girls, so I don't think it's even truly hit me yet. The shutdown is all over the news though, but just like anything else, the media surrounding it will start to die off, and people will stop caring as much. Now, we just wait, and wait, and wait. The Governor has decided he wants everyone to "have a break" over the Holiday weekend to "cool off"...so they don't even have any talks scheduled. Awesome.

It's pretty hot today, our weather has been so inconsistent lately. S0, other than spending a little time playing in the pool and sprinkler, we pretty much stayed inside most of the day. I woke up with a massive headache, and Olivia was acting out all morning, so she was sent to her room a couple time. The day was pretty much just a normal day around the house...playing, picking up, eating, naps. Nothing too exciting. I got caught up on the blog and spent some time on the computer. Christian worked some OT today, typical for Friday. His mom bought us all some take out for dinner, and stopped over to eat with us. The, it was time for bed. So, it was a fairly low key day for us. Just, letting reality sink in!

Here is a picture of the girls in the sprinkler. Cuties!

6/30/11 - Today is the Day

I'm about to turn in for the night, and I'm filled with so many emotions. The day has come...our final chance of avoiding the shutdown and layoffs has come and gone. I am, officially, laid off (along with 35,000 other state employees, including my mom, my aunt and two cousins, along with friends and co-workers I care about deeply). I don't like this feeling. I can honestly say, I never in a million years thought I would be in this position. I was fortunate to get a temporary summer position at my work shortly after graduating high school. I was even more fortunate to be asked to stay on permanently, and 10 years later, here we are. Working for the government is no cake walk or free ride by any means, but it's nearly impossible to get fired...yet, here I am. Essentially fired. I won't even be there to celebrate my 10 year anniversary with the Department, which is next Tuesday.

Today was a very difficult day. The building was full, but there was an eery silence echoing through the building, you could see the stress and emotions on the face of everybody you passed. While a majority of employees worked hard to keep a positive attitude, keep a sense of humor about themselves and work through the stress, it was a very somber day. As I got ready this morning, I honestly felt like I was getting ready for my last day of school. Like I was about to say goodbye for the summer to all of my friends.

We pretty much knew this morning that it was a done deal. The [democratic] Governor and the republican leaders have been meeting in secret for a while now, and once they finally come to an agreement, they will need to call back the entire legislature, vote on each individual bill and pass them into law. That all takes time, so there was no way it would happen. Our Department started shutting down rest areas yesterday, construction sites have been working on closing down for several days now...the wheels have been in motion.

As quitting time approached, I set my out of office reply on my e-mail, recorded the standard voicemail we were instructed to use, and I dropped my badge in the office envelope on my way out the door. As I walked to my car, I watched a sea of employees leave the building with their boxes and bags of personal belongings, their plants...each with a slightly lost look about them. I got in my car and pulled out of the lot, for the last time in who knows how long, and all of the emotions finally erupted. I let out a few tears and all of the fears started to set in.

What's going to happen now? How long will we be out of work? Once we go back, what will the future agreed upon budget have in store for us? Are we going to make it? I have a never ending stream of questions running through my head, and they just won't stop.

For now, I choose to focus on the silver linings. I get the chance to spend some much needed quality time with the girls. I have the chance to focus on myself a little bit, get in some nap time work outs and get myself back on track. Depending on how long we're out, I'll have time to get ready for our upcoming Duluth vacation and for Amelia's birthday party, without running around like a chicken with my head cut off. If there was ever a silver lining, this is definitely a good one!

So, that's where I'm at right now. I'm a big ball of emotions and not quite sure what to do with them right now. But, here's a picture of my little baby girl...Olivia was sharing grass with her. Awesome!

6/29/11 - Under Pressure

Today was a pretty usual day...for now anyway. It was another day pretty much just preparing for the shutdown at work. We had a big office meeting with the BIG, big boss so we could ask some questions and get a little more information. I'm busy trying to rush through a few last Contracts that need to be in place by the end of the day tomorrow...one of them is actually a critical service, so the work under it will continue on during the shutdown. It was nice to do something that actually mattered for a change!

I stopped in to the grocery store after work to pick up a few things for dinner the next few nights. Then, met up with the rest of the family and my mother in law at home for dinner. We grilled some burgers and veggies, played in the pool for a while and enjoyed the weather. Things are supposed to turn super humid and gross the next few days, so I'm glad we got out to enjoy it.

After dinner, Christian brought his mom home and the girls were off to bed. I don't know what was wrong with Amelia tonight, but she would not go down. She was screaming bloody murder, like she was in serious pain. Poor thing. Eventually she passed out, but I have no clue what was going on. Now, I have to try to get some sleep, which won't be easy since my mind is racing a mile a minute right now!

Here are some pictures of our outdoor fun. The girls got to sport their new swimsuits! YAY. I much prefer one piece suits for little girls, and was SOOOO excited when I found these...they snap on the bottom (like a onesie), so easy peasy for the diapered and newly potty trained!

6/28/11 - Another Wasted Day

Well, I wasted away another day at Training today. BOO. As I mentioned last week, I seriously hate training. As if we don't have anything else to be doing right now. And of course, yet again, it was a training that I really didn't even need to take...learning a piece of the new system that I won't even be using. SO ANNOYING! The only good thing about these training classes is that they are computer training's, so I'm able to check my e-mail and get SOME work done while I'm there. This class actually got out quite early too, which was nice!

After work, I stopped in to Target to pick up the "fun" stuff (diapers, wipes, etc.) and Walgreens...to pick up a collage print...of AMELIA! Can you believe it, 11 months later I've finally printed, AND hung a picture of Amelia! I'm sad...with all of the pictures I take, I NEVER print a single one. How sad is that?!?

After that, we all met up at home and hung out for the night. Nothing too exciting. Here is Amelia giving the sit and spin a try! She thought it was hilarious!

6/27/11 - It's the Final Countdown

It's here....the final week, the days are ticking down and time is running out. If a budget is not in place by midnight Thursday, we are shutting down and I'll be laid off. This is going to be a long, stressful, emotional week, that's for sure. I am so sick of the waiting game...wait, wait, wait. We just need answers, action and we need all of this to end. I'm upset as a state employee, obviously, but even more so as a citizen of the state. There is simply no excuse for this.

Work was for the most park, work as usual. We're still trying to just keep things going and keep moving along. It's hard though. I mean, I write Contracts with consultants, for projects that are not going to be able to continue as of the 1st. It's hard not to feel like you are just wasting your time and doing something for nothing at this point. But, life doesn't stop, and we need to just keep going!

We really didn't do anything tonight after work. I think we're both silently so stressed over my upcoming lay off, that things at home are a little quiet right now. Here is a picture of my big girl, washed and ready for bed!

6/26/11 - 11 Months

SHUT UP! My baby is 11 months old today! I simply cannot believe that. I can remember this time last year like it was yesterday. The anxiety, the eagerness, the worry, the fear, the OMG I'm 9 months pregnant soreness...all of it. I feel like I was just carrying around this amazing gift inside of me, and now she's this crazy, wild child taking over our house!

Amelia is STILL in Size 2 diapers and 6-9 month clothes. I keep thinking she's just about ready to move up, but then she just doesn't quite grow! When it comes to "milk", she is still 100% breastfed, and I'm still loving it. As I've said the past couple months, I'll be happy to hang up my pump in the next month or two for a while, but when I'll actually stop nursing, I'm not sure. She finds comfort in it, therefore I do too. And, being so small, there's nothing better for her growing body them breast milk, so it can only do more good than anything. So, we'll see what happens there.

I am officially calling her a walker now. Walking is her main mode of transportation at this point. Don't get me wrong, she has that wobbly, drunk, Frankenstein walk going on still, but she's getting GREAT at it, and rarely crawls any more. She follows us everywhere, more than ever now, and she thinks walking is the funniest thing ever. It's WAY too cute.

Mom is still the only thing she says, yet she "talks" non stop, all day long. She is SO happy, and has the most amazing smile I've ever seen. She lights up a room with her smile, and it's totally contagious. She's starting to develop quite a personality these days, and a whole lot of attitude to go with it. She's not taking much crap from her big sister any more, and I think Olivia is going to be in for some BIG trouble in the next few months!

This morning, I was filled with so much joy. I laid in bed, watching the girls on the monitor after they woke up this morning. They were chatting and laughing and having a good old time. I think Olivia was still pretty tired, and she kept telling Amelia "Shhh, I'm tired, go sleepy". Amelia dropped her blankie out of the crib, so Olivia QUICK ran, picked it up, threw it back in, and ran back to bed...Amelia of course then decided this was a game, and kept doing it....Olivia was not too happy about that. She kept getting it back for her, but would say "I told you, don't throw it out", in a very annoyed tone of voice. Finally, I moved the camera, and she started yelling at me to "Go sleepy DUDE". I couldn't help but laugh and laugh. It was so fun watching them interact with each other, and Olivia is just beyond entertaining.

We had a pretty busy day today. Christian and Olivia cleaned up the garage and his truck, and once I got Amelia down for a nap, I joined them. We sprayed down the outdoor toys, moved the "tree" swing, and did a lot of cleaning up outside. MUCH needed cleaning up. Then, we were all off to dinner at his parents house. They called us up to let us know they were grilling some chicken....so, since we don't pass up free food, we took them up on the offer.

I once again was burned from being outside, and my contacts are WAY overused (and out of date), so the combination has been giving me a head ache lately. Today was no different, so we didn't stay too long. Once we got home, the girls played for a little while, and were off to bed.

So, that's our day. Here is Amelia's 11 month photo. SO BIG!

6/25/11 - Game Day

Today was a day I look forward to all year long...Game Day! Every year my dad's side of the family gets together at my Grandparents' house for a croquet tournament. We play other outdoor games and just spend the day together as well, but the tournament is the main attraction. Of course, it rained today. But, we play rain or shy (it's serious business). It never got too bad, but I was quite wet from time to time, that's for sure.

Olivia was in heaven with all of the other kids. Just playing the day away. Amelia was so well behaved, I couldn't believe it! I thought for sure she'd be attached to my hip from the minute we got there, but she was quite a social butterfly.

Neither Christian nor I had a very impressive croquet day. But, that's OK. We got to eat lots of yummy food and spend time with everybody, so that was good enough!

We headed home, a little past bedtime, and the girls went right to bed. They were beyond exhausted, so this better mean a nice long night of sleep! Christian was off to hang out with my cousin for a little while, so I had a nice, quiet night to myself.

Early this afternoon my mom called me with some news. She's heard that a friend of mine from high school was killed in a car crash this morning. It was so surreal to me. Christine and I were not best friends by any means, but she was a great person. So caring, the nicest person you could ever know. I don't think in all of our school years I'd ever heard one bad thing about her. She was engaged to another guy we went to school with, they'd been together since 8th grade! Can you imagine, to be so young, having spent over half of your life with somebody, and lose them this way? I just can't even fathom the though.

Reports came out later that she was driving on a two land road, and was hit head on by another vehicle. The other driver was 19 years old (minor injuries), and it's being reported that she was drunk. I can't tell you how much this enrages me. There is no excuse for drinking and driving, NONE, but even worse, at 19 years old, at 8:3o in the morning?!? It just breaks my heart. The accident itself is so tragic, but to find out why it happened in the first place, makes me so angry.

So, my thoughts and prayers go out to her family, friends and the many people who's lives she's touched. She was taken WAY too soon, and it's truly not fair in any sense of the word.

6/24/11 - Finally Friday

Yes, it's Friday again. FINALLY. The end to another long, very stressful week. Today was a pretty low key day. Some people at work are starting to have pretty bad attitudes. I feel like there is no excuse for that. We are ALL in the same position right now, and we don't have any control over what's going on, so what is the point in coming to work with bad attitudes, throwing fits, pouting and just all around acting like a toddler. I get enough of that crap at home, I shouldn't need to put up with it at work. Too bad you can't get reprimanded for being crabby! LOL

I did get an awesome facebook alert halfway through the day that Old Navy facebook fans could get tanks for $2.00 today, so a coworker and I made a quick stop on our lunch break. Can't pass that up! So, that turned things around for me a little bit!

After work, it was apparent that my mom had a LONG day with the girls. Olivia was up to her usual ways, acting out towards Amelia. I took the girls to Target, did a little shopping, and we met up with Christian back at home for some dinner. After dinner we headed over to my BFF's new house to check it out. Olivia burned off some much needed energy playing with Andrew and his cousins, and we got in lots of laughs with Kari, her sister and the guys. The girls passed out right away on the way home, and we were not far behind.

Here is a picture of Amelia, after devouring some cookies. Lucky duck!

6/23/11 - Double Congrats for by BFF!!

Today was just a typical Thursday for me. Work, which included a meeting that turned pretty ugly. We had a little group meeting to talk about some processes and make sure things are working well within the office...I knew before the meeting even started that it was going to turn ugly just because people take things so personally and want to act like everything is an attack on them. So, just as I expected, that's exactly what happened. I swear, half the time I truly feel like I never left high school with the drama that goes on at work!

Today was an ultra amazing day for my best friend though. She closed on her first house today, and was so excited about it. I'm so proud of her! Then, to top it off, her boyfriend FINALLY popped the question, so she got engaged on top of it!! I'm so excited and beyond happy for her. Things are going so amazingly for her right now, and she definitely deserves it! So, I feel like I'm going to have quite a busy year ahead of me helping her wedding plan, but I wouldn't have it any other way! YAY.

We just hung out around the house tonight. Nothing too exciting. Here is a picture of Amelia...you can probably guess what we had for dinner tonight!